Join the Ashes of Creation MMORPG
(Register or log in to remove advertisements - why ads?)

Throat Adder

Started by Sordak
Post #63192

Likes Given: 46
Likes Received: 867
Faction & Race:
Ebonheart Pact (Argonian)

Topal bay, which lies east of Dusk, west of Roscrea and south of Snowhawk but not north of any particular place, an island not named after an endearing old couple from the deshaan area, but quite close.
a couple of hundred years before the birth of a certain sura-ding.

Lounging in a beach chair was NH (who was a wizard) , cannons aimed at White-Gold in a high arch.
R who could swallow three coconuts, an ability which has both proven vital to a daring escape from akaviri occupied Yneslea after smuggling wasabi from Cathnoquey, but also made him highly popular among the shield-biters that came the long way from the southern Skyrim who had become war-husbands during the battle of Dunstad, raised his voice of the sound of a rusty chain dragging along a kettle:” This is bullshit” kicking off his beach chair which quickly sunk beneath the tide of the Topal bay, the dreugh would enjoy it he thought.
“ This island is bullshit!” he exclaimed again kicking the sand.
And soon the men joined the choir. Amongst them Craeghest son of Druin son of Maed son of Lun-Lir son of Aolaun son of Hurin son of Jakhebezetehel son of Svetnir son of Gaulib son of Gaulib son of Hrofnar son of Rurik son of Herkel who nobody liked to call by his name, Hertgeir Hertgeirson, Sarraku who was a dunmer and not a redguard (despite stating otherwise) and TC who was the most handsome of them all but only if you would ask Ellya Erdain.

And the Spear-Chiefs, who were TC, R and NH (who was a wizard), concluded that change must be at hand. Leaning over a map that was looted from a shop in Falkreath, the Spear-Chiefs decided that course must be set for Stirk for Stirk is home to wenches both colovian and raga.

Men aboard ship, TC pointed his spear (to which he attached the flag of the skald-king) skyward but noticed that kyne would not bless them with her breath. In anger he roared in primeval savagery.
NH (who was a wizard) said in his war-voice “LeaVeiTTOMe” and he gathered his breath, positioning himself behind the sails of the Svetti Maria, shouting with all his might “STRUNBahQO!”

“SHIT!” the men could hear Thunder cackling above their heads and a Storm rose but from the south, mighty waves crashing against the flanks of the Svetti Maria. Drifting northward R tried to adjusted the sails, as lightning struck like the vengeful wrath of a thousand scorned women tearing the mast asunder.

The RESPLENDENT INFANTICIDE anchored in quiet waters as suddenly a storm roared.
Captain 148175,who was dressed in an uniform composed entirely of polygonal shapes and stood 4 meters tall, mostly for using stilts inside her long boots, “her” was actually an assumption as nobody was quite sure of the captains gender as both nobody dared to ask and that the difference is not all that large in those of altmer stock, thus even her breeding-assigned could not tell without doubt, ordered the crew to set sail despite the odds. What measure is a life compared to a strict route plan?
Switching to her Ink-eyes she glanced over the wings of the sunbirds, noticing an odd shape on the turbulent waters.
This was not noted in the Alinor-directives, someone would have to be accountable for this negligence.
While she was already turning on her heels to fill in a formal complaint about this lack of information she spotted that this odd shape is indeed a vessel.
At first she would have mistaken the creatures within as Bosmer. Living on an Island for two months turns ones hide dark and ones belly thick. But after closer examination she could smell the stench of Humans, Beastmen and Velothi-nil-heresies.
Furious (but not too furious to make her flesh-molded aldmer face flinch) 148175 ordered to her crew to open fire.

Soulgem-induced fire warps smashing against the Svetti Marias side, setting it aflame, with a voice turning into animal screams R shouted “Give em a good broadside lads!”
Men burned by ash as they were manning the cannons, powder barrels exploding under deck.
But TC ripped open a cannons load chute and called out for NH (who was a wizard)
“This is our only chance! Move like this!” his voice was barely to make out over the sounds of battle and death around the Spear-Chiefs “You must THOOM launch this cannon!” as the other Chiefs understood what he was saying R ate the remaining cannonballs,which were named rilmare, paul, june and herkel (some legends tell of him shitting magnificent ringmail which would later be known as the Lords mail) and NH (who was a Wizard) took all his breath “i will not fuck it up this time” he thought and shouted “FUSRODAH!” into the metal contraption. The blast tore the nozzle raining metal shrapnel all over the RESPLENDENT INFANTICIDE (which some say Captain 148175 took like she'd have done it many times before) but the THOOM was so strong that it propelled she ship northward traveling sideways towards White-Gold till it eventually shattered at the shores of lake Rumare.

The Svetti Maria destroyed and all dreams of the stirkian wenches gone the remaining horde of wicked men poured into the Once-Jungled heartland and proceeded to rape the Seat of sundered kings with fury that would make Old Pelinal proud.
This post was last modified: April 30th 2013, 06:54 AM by Sordak
Like this post Reply
The following 5 users Like Sordak's post:
Ewan, Idriar, Najla, Nehemia, Rage
Post #63197

Likes Given: 206
Likes Received: 633
Faction & Race:
Aldmeri Dominion (Altmer)

As I understand Ebonheart battle ship against Aldmeri Battleship...

It´s a little hard to follow, but once you´ve figured that out, it gets clear...

But the people named after one or two letters? NH seems to be a tongue master, even if he´s called a mage. But I can´t figure the other races...

and the Altmer captains name would be

Aah Nd H(ah) Aah Nght Ft... I would refer to him as Andangifit ;)

I like it anyway, even if the cannon ball eating disturbs me a little... nice idea of Thuum usage ;)
This post was last modified: May 1st 2013, 05:37 AM by Idriar

Who controls the Septim crown?
Who keeps the Allesian Heresy down?
We do, we do

Who knocked Yokuda off the maps?
Who keeps the Dwemer under wraps?
We do, we do

Like this post Reply
Post #63198

Likes Given: 46
Likes Received: 867
Faction & Race:
Ebonheart Pact (Argonian)

mostly botched from the raid on pynadonea.
TC is easy to figure out just type the name given on his first reference into UESP.
As for R its quite clear on the remark on his voice.

Also the (who was a wizard) one is actually a reference to something completeley different.
This post was last modified: April 30th 2013, 06:53 AM by Sordak
Like this post Reply
Post #63391

Likes Given: 43
Likes Received: 335
Faction & Race:
Ebonheart Pact (Dunmer)
The wizard appears to know good THOOM, and just doesn't know it yet.

Come, Unstoppable Eraser Rain
Throat Adder | Societas Daemonica
Like this post Reply

Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)
(Register or log in to remove advertisements - why ads?)

This fan site is not affiliated with ZeniMax Media Inc. or any of its subsidiaries. Including, but not limited to, Bethesda Game Studios and ZeniMax Online Studios.
The Elder Scrolls® images © ZeniMax Media Inc. / Forum content ©